Happy Little Trees

This week my job was to paint a simple tree in my soon to be daughters bedroom. I thought... no problem.....I'm an artsie kind of girl. I will bring out my skills from all of my past art classes, make Mrs. Wolf proud (my favorite art teacher)....this will be cake! Well maybe not yummy cake, but burnt with too much baking soda kind of cake! Ha!

Lets just say things weren't going as planned, and I was dreading this process.....then by day 3 I had a thought. I'm not sure if any of you have read, "The Last Lecture" by the late Randy Pausch. (Awesome book by the way....get out there and read it. You'll never be the same!) In his book he talks about wanting to paint his room as a child...and finally one year to his disbelief his mom said yes. So he paints....an elevator door, pandoras box, and other goofy stuff. He recalls it being one of his best childhood memories.

I had never done anything like that before! But I too....always wanted to tear down my pale blue wallpaper with the pink hearts and bows.....and paint my room red...with a big, fat, pink pig! No joke....if you knew me back then, this would make sense to you!

So anyway....I started to think....this is my chance. This isn't a chore. This is some fun shit, pardon my french...but it is! I am living out one of my childhood dreams of painting my room while I paint my daughters childhood room! All of a sudden the trees got easy, relaxing, and FUN! And guess what....they are DONE!!! I hope you enjoy them as much as I do! Cheers to "happy little trees!!!"

P.S. I dedicate these happy little trees to Randy Pausch and one of my favorite men....Bob Ross!

This pregnacy has not been bad....but hasn't been great either. But with me at 23 weeks as we speak I have realized how I can make it more enjoyable! Thru much trial and error I have found that if you go on with your normal everyday life just as you did before...the symptoms go away!

Okay not for everyone....but think about it! Complaining brings the problems to the surface. I mean are my boobies getting huge, YES do they have yucky veins going thru them like a cows utter, YES. Do I get so bloated at night that I have to get on my hands and knees just to roll over in bed, YES. Do I have pains from my old c-section that feel like your ripping in half that NO ONE told me about.....YES And is constipation painful enough that you find yourself praying to Jesus...HELL YES! But why complain, it doesn't get you anywhere.

So today I have a great friend with me, a sunny morning, and a big cup of coffee. The bloating has calmed and I look like a normal almost 6 months along preggo and fabulous lady! Sans the hives I might add! Hallejuah! Life is good!

What I find is that the people who complain truely have NOTHING to complain about....but the ones who do!?!?! never let it in their vocabulary! Have a great weekend!:)

To be a Dinosaur Bodyguard....

Wednesday July 15th, 2009 the day we learned that this little monster in my belly is a baby GIRL! Go figure....ladies always know how to get people to notice them. And if its by giving your mother teenage acne and a case of serious Hives....so be it! Let the mother and daughter relationship begin!

My hubbie has ALWAYS said that he wants all boys. With a boy you only have to worry about your son's penis....with a girl, you have to worry about every elses penis! Sick I know, but sadly so true! He also was worried about the money she was going to strip him of, and will she be exactly like her mother (but not in the GOOD way), and the wiping from front to back freaks him out to no end! But to much of my surprise the moment the Xray tech said girl....you could almost see his heart melt. Little does he know it, but she is already working on getting wrapped around that finger....

As for me. I am SUPER excited! I come from a family of 3 brothers...then having Gavin, the hubbie and Moe (who is also a boy) I am ready for that extra estrogen! My thoughts of this little pink bundle of joy are that I hope she will be a nice person, confident, funny, smart, athletic, with MY eyes, great hair, straight teeth, daddys temperment, and her own sense of style. What more could you ask for in the coolest girl in the world!

As for her BIG brother......ummmm...is he excited!?! Not so much.
"Gavin are you so excited to have a baby SISTER!?"
"No"
"Why not!?"
"I want a BOY!!!"
"Why!?"
"Caaaauuuuusssse"(he likes to exaggerate the cause)
"But did you know that if you have a sister you need to grow EXTRA big and strong to protect her from icky, ugly, no good boys.....You have to be her bodyguard and watch after her...."
All of a sudden the little 2 year old looks up at me! His brown eyes grow larger and full of excitment as he says...
"Like a DINOSAUR???"
All I can think is....WHAT!!!!
"Umm.....sure....."
Seriously holding back laughter from this comment was harder then usual. I have NO IDEA where in the HELL he came up with that. But who cares.... it worked. Were on day 3 and we haven't had a "I want a boy" tantrum since.

Gavin is now officially known as the "Dinosaur Bodyguard" and he wouldn't have it any other way!

So as I have said before....I am organized. Procrastination in not in MY vocabulary. Actually, now I'm lying. The unpregnant, not dealing with a two year old, working professional Jami would NOT have ever excepted the THOUGHT of procrastinating....this new version of me. Whatever......

Anyhoo we are going on a weekend trip to Ohio for a birthday party. Yes....we ARE that nice! The roadtrip begins in 2 weeks......I finally remembered that Moe the Mut is going to need a place to stay. So what do I do....I make a list of all the things that needed to be done today....one of which....call the "Pet Resort" yes...you have read me clearly, my doggie is one spoiled pup! I have the phone up to my ear, my navy colored Sharpie in my hand waiting with anticipation to cross this off of my list!

"ummm......mam..(which I want to yell MISS!!!) we are completly booked that entire weekend. Would you like to be put on our waiting list!?"

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! Why did I wait until the last minute! NOW I can't cross it off my list, I have to find a backup RESORT, and I am so annoyed that I can't even function. What do I do!? Do I go play with my son....spend time with the dog......go about my chores for the day!?
No....I sit here with a chocolate chip cookie in my hand and BLOG!!! Happy Manic Monday everyone!

Its official....I'm pregnant!

So I am EXACTLY 20 weeks today.....so half way! Actually.....I'm one of those special gals that gets to be chopped in half to retrieve my little bambino. Which means.....I can pick my date....which means....I won't put myself thru 40 weeks of this itchy bloatedness....which means.... Hallelujah!!! I'm past the half way point!

So far I've been lucky. No....I'm definatly not glowing unless you consider shiney, red, inflamed bumps, glowing! But I HAVE managed to keep my weight under control....yeah amazing to me too! Each time I go into the doctors office I slip off my shoes and take deep breathes to buy MORE time so I can prolong that damn scale....(dramatic I know!) But to my surprise the past 4 visits. I have been losing weight! WHAT!?! I guess its called eating healthy and exercising....who would have thought! Anyhoo....the nurses keep saying things like, "Ummm......It's kinda time that you started to gain some weight" (secretly I love it when they say this)

But I think that ship has just left the port. The time is now. I know cravings and/or aversions are common in EVERY pregnancy. Do I LOVE a mustard potato salad a bit more these days....YES......Do I think about the Arby's medium Roast beef with a side of their special BBQ sauce everytime I drive by....YES....have I lost the desire to drink my favorite cheap bottle of Pinot Noir......very sadly YES. But this is the norm...nothing crazy.

Until now....the scale better start running...I have officially crossed the border in more ways then one. It happened with Gavin and now again with this bun in my oven! SEVERE....and I mean ravenous cravings for MEXICAN. Spicy, cheesey, guacamole filled beef things with a bit of heaven on the side. When done right it can be truely orgasmic.....REALLY. So I am calling it now, baby number two's first hormonal, side splinting, on the verge of tears, begging for the hubbie to go after hours, don't care where you find it craving! CHIPOTLE....a burrito bowl with Barbecola, lettuce, key lime rice, pinto beans, roasted corn salsa, sour cream and extra guacamole!! I ate it ALL while giving Gavin his night time bath....now I bet THAT was a sight!

But I have to say the quote for the evening came from my beloved husband who looked down at me on the white tiles of our bathroom floor as I washed a toddlers hair while wiping guac from my chin........ "Damn, you are so pregnant!"

Bored Out of My Mind Bread

Well its been almost 5 days since the start of my hellish incident with "the Hives". And since going outside on these beautiful days has been out of the question.....what else is there to do then BAKE. Here is a yummy recipe for those of you with gardens or like me, have neighbors with gardens that bring you a lovely abundance of veggies that you don't know what the hell to do with!

Zucchini Bread

3 1/4cups of Flour

1 1/2 tsps Kosher Salt

1 tsp ground Nutmeg

2 tsps Baking Soda

1 tsp Ground Cinnamon

3 cups of Sugar

1 cup veggie Oil

4 beaten Eggs

2/3 cups of Water

2 1/2 cups of Zucchini

1 tsp of Vanilla extract

2 cups of Chocolate Chips

Preheat oven to 350.....Mix all dry ingrediets plus chocolate chips in a bowl. Using a mixure combine all wet ingredients. Once combined add dry mix slowly. Do not over beat. Divide into 2 greased loaf pans and bake for 60mins...or until done! Enjoy! Cause its YUMMY!

Keeping it interesting...

Here I am.......it's 9:00 and the kid and dog are FINALLY off to bed. Its completly quiet except for the air conditioner running. I sit at our desk in front of the computer. In my line of vision are presciptions, doctors appointment cards, Arbonne products that need mailed out (sorry ladies if your waiting) and a mostly empty bottle of calamine lotion!

Today was a rough one.....the only blessing was that the hubbie got to stay home from work to help handle the MESS we call our life!

Here is goes......for the past few days I have been slowly turning into a medical mystery. I woke one night with uber swollen, itchy, and pressure filled hands....I refer to them as my MAN HANDS. Sadly they werent just man hands they were 6 foot 7 and FAT man hands! Isn't that a lovely picture! Since then I have developed swollen feet, joint pain, chest pain, and my personal favorite....HIVES. Not just a wee little rash....a complete infestation of them covering the bottoms of me feet to the tippity top of my scalp! Doesn't that sound yummy!? and enjoyable!? After some steriods and some Benadryl.....I am exactly in the same place I was before. Irritable and Itchie!

My hubbie on the otherhand...he learned a bit more about a stay at home mom! His morning began at 5:00 when he had to run to the pharmacy to get me ANYTHING that could make my pain go away, after that he made a wonderful breakfast that no one ate, bandaged our lawn guy after an incident with a pointy tree branch! But first let me say... Backyardigans band-aids are a little bit of MAGIC! Then the hubbie did the lunch thing, listened to me moan and groan, dealt with the dogs usual destruction, and put the kid down for a nap. Then like a truely awesome man he lathered his wife down with calamine lotion before placing socks on her hands and feet and forced HER to take a nap. Which I thoroughly enjoyed as much as you could....given the pain, fever and all!

Then he learned about NAP TIME....from now on I don't think he will ever call during this time of heaven again! He understands the meaning of TiVo, a couch and QUIET!

The rest of the day was about the same....I lounged, talked on the phone...while he watered flowers, took out the trash, gave the dog a bath, and then.........it happened.......

The perfect father, husband, and friend did what every woman does atleast once a week. He hit the breaking point, lets just say "the shit hit the fan"....or maybe just the dining room rug. Our favorite dog, who has been accident free for months, took a big, huge, wet CRAP on the nice freshly cleaned carpet.

And that was it...if you have been in this situation there are no need for words!

"Screw the dog.....this sucks. You take care of this. I'm going upstairs to take a shower!!!"

And there he went, yup, I bet I looked pretty damn pathetic with my hives scrubbing a rug on my hands and knees. But I tell you this....something about making someone see YOUR side of the story can make all those itchies go away! And now he officially had a true day in the life of a housewife!

And P.S. I WILL be reminding him of this day the next time he comes home from work and asks, "why are YOU so moody!?"